Annually, the Woman Scouts of America donates 1000’s of packing containers of their scrumptious signature Woman Scout cookies to 1000’s of America’s women and men in uniform deployed abroad.
Whether or not you’re ready for the Woman Scout cookie load-in earlier than your ship leaves port or hoping for a field of Tagalongs to point out up at your FOB, are you getting essentially the most out of your seasonally obtainable cookies? Attempt our useful information for pairing Woman Scout cookies with the suitable second in your deployment.
Do-si-dos: These pleasant little peanut butter sandwiches remind you of residence, the place you’re proud to defend!
Trios: What the hell are these? These are the worst cookies you’ve ever seen. You by no means bought cookies like this at residence. Go away it to the navy to wreck all the things. Form of like your management.
Samoas: These little chunky rings are loaded up with bits of goodies, type of like your spouse, Savannah, who’s actually placing on some weight because you left.
Savannah Smiles: These lemon cookies are as bitter as your emotions if you discover out that Savannah has been getting railed by your finest buddy, but it surely’s good that somebody’s smiling! That powdered sugar is about as exhausting to wash up because the nasty custody battle you’re about to start out out of spite.
Tagalongs: These peanut butter and chocolate classics will make you would like that one thing, something will break of the monotony of deployment.
Skinny Mints: Your first kill. You’re a frosty bitch now, aren’t you? The cool mint taste will match your soul, now which you can really feel what it’s prefer to see a life slip away earlier than you and know that you just brought about it. These come packaged in sleeves, however you’ll be stunned how simple 24 cookies will go down, similar to you by no means realized how simply, within the second of reality, you’d kill to additional a political aim you may’t even perceive, not to mention justify.
Trefoils: You by no means sleep as of late, and also you’re at all times on edge. You’ll redeploy and finish your time within the navy. You’ll even go to school; discover a new spouse. Similar to these cookies that haven’t modified their recipe since 1917, you’ll discover a option to make every day appear like the final, although you’re a shadow of the person you thought you as soon as had been.
You lastly attain out to Savannah, and understand that you just left her lengthy earlier than she left you, the best way that you just needed to chase what? Glory? An outdated model of manhood? Similar to it’s exhausting to imagine cookie made with substances so easy and healthful can also be so fattening, it’s exhausting to reconcile with a company that talks about responsibility, and purity, and integrity, however then pays you to spend one of the best years of your youth mired mud, sand and blood.
Thanks for the beneficiant donations, Woman Scouts. We love our cookies, and we love our troops!