Opinion: Marines on steroids are all the trend proper now. Severely. Please ship assist

Good Morning, Marines.

Because the 37th Commandant of the Marine Corps, it’s my distinct privilege to steer and serve you on this distinctive and important war-fighting group. Regardless of the hardship of this place and the accountability it entails, working alongside our devoted Marines and Sailors has been one among my life’s best joys.

Nevertheless, one factor has weighed closely on my thoughts these previous few years, a confession that must be made earlier than God and man, alike. Fellow Marines, I, Gen. Robert Neller, am very drained.

I’m simply exhausted. I’ve been doing this shit since 1975, and I’ve received to let you know, man, I’m pooped. I legitimately can’t keep in mind the final time I slept. I feel I took a nap within the Pentagon car parking zone final week earlier than a gathering with Dunford, however I’m actually undecided.

I imply, what sort of shitty-ass job is that this after I can’t let my head hit the fucking pillow with out some cracked-out aide telling me a 28-year-old employees sergeant in Miramar texted an image of his ding-dong to a lance corporal and now its on Reddit. What-the-literal-fuck, Marines?

Or how about this, the opposite evening, I used to be having dinner with my spouse — who, by the way in which, has seen me about 4 instances previously eight weeks — after I get a name from Gen. Berger, who’s like, hey Commandant, guess what, a 7-ton in Okinawa simply crashed into a lightweight pole, and now you must converse to the fucking Japanese Prime Minister. Are. You. Fucking. Kidding. Me.

Hear up idiots. I get it. This isn’t a zero-defect group. Errors occur. I’m fucking monitoring.

However you assholes — and I’m talking to everybody subordinate to me, which is actually all of you — have to get your heads out of your buttholes, for… I don’t know… the subsequent three hours.

Simply let me rack out underneath my desk. I imply this. I’ll name a Marine Corps-wide security stand down if it means I can take a nap.

Backside line, Marines: It’s not straightforward on the prime.

So subsequent time you consider ingesting and driving or smoking close to a gasoline pump or breaking into the amnesty field, please rethink. Bear in mind, shield what you’ve earned and let me sleep. When you’ve got any questions, I’m within the fucking International.

Gen. Robert Neller is the 37th Commandant of the Marine Corps. Previous to his present project, he served because the Commander, Marine Forces Command from July 2014 to September 2015 and Commander, Marine Forces Central Command from September 2012 to June 2014. He hasn’t had a full eight hours of sleep since round 1997.