Turkey Tours

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E-Four by chance joins precise mafia in mix-up

JOINT BASE MCGUIRE-DIX-LAKEHURST, N.J. — In an effort to hitch the E-Four mafia, an area soldier has as a substitute joined the precise mafia, sources confirmed immediately. Newly-promoted Spc. Rafael Hernandez first realized one thing was amiss when, in line with his testimony in court docket, he caught a hastily-constructed shiv into the bottom of an

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Leaked: Fortnite revealed to be Ender’s Sport

PENTAGON — Very similar to the seek for the golden ticket in Willy Wonka, the nation has erupted right into a candy Fortnite gaming sesh that doubles as actual world operation to pick out the chief of all U.S. forces, sources confirmed at the moment. Billed as a battle royale online game, Fortnite has gamers vie

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7 habits of extremely efficient suicide bombers

Are you a suicide bomber aspirant struggling to reach right this moment’s saturated market? Are you envious that everybody is asking Yusuf the “Damascus Dominator” as a result of he courageously took out a room full of youngsters with a suicide vest? We right here at Duffel Weblog perceive that blowing your self up is

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Optimistic personal sees burn pit as half full

CAMP LEMONNIER, Djibouti – Pfc. Braddock Chase, the best velocity motivator within the 1-167th Infantry doesn’t take heed to the haters and draggers and prefers to see the burn pits as half full, sources confirmed right this moment. “A whole lot of guys, you understand, give attention to the unhealthy shit. I give attention to how

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Absence of murderer from future confuses bold firm commander

Fort Bragg, N.C. — An organization commander is expressing shock and dismay that after six years within the Military a future murderer has but to journey again in time and try to kill him, sources confirmed in the present day. Capt. Ben Hawkingson, an organization commander with the 82nd Airborne Division, has completed each objective

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Are millennials killing the aimless, protracted battle trade?

Have we reached the top of publicly-supported, mutli-decade wars that don’t have any estimable completion deadline and no clear-cut goals? Now that they’re performed ruining the turkey trade, it seems that millennials have discovered one other staple of the American economic system to kill. Current polls performed by Stanford College have indicated that youth born