Sergeant Main invitations Taylor Swift to Marine Corps Birthday Ball

SAN DIEGO — Following within the footsteps of quite a few junior Marines, Sgt. Maj. Tom Randall lately posted a YouTube video asking singer Taylor Swift to the Marine Corps ball, sources confirmed at this time.

“Good day Miss Swift. On November 10, 1775, a Corps of Marines was created by a decision of the Continental Congress … and um, yearly we have fun the start of our Corps with large balls — I imply um, like, a celebration. I used to be questioning if you need to be my date to the ball. I hope to BCNU later,” Randall mentioned, in his verbal assault on human decency.

Information of the video unfold shortly, and the subject dominated the dialog in barracks and chow halls worldwide.

“Eww, that’s so gross. He’s like 50 years older than her!” proclaimed Cpl. Brittany Smith.

“Is she even sufficiently old to legally drink?” requested Lance Cpl. Juan Ramirez, earlier than bursting into hysterical, hungover laughter together with his associates.

“I TOTES can’t imagine he mentioned ‘BCNU’ out loud! Hashtag ridiculous,” Smith added.

Different members of the E-9 group tried to purpose with Randall and get him to take down the video.

“Look Tom, I do know your final three wives left you as a result of, clearly, the Corps comes first — Hail Chesty! — and also you’re lonely. Simply delete the video. You may decide up a lady in Oceanside or Tijuana like the remainder of us do and overlook this complete factor ever occurred,” mentioned Grasp Gunnery Sgt. Martin Warner.

When requested for touch upon the video invitation, Swift graciously responded from behind her father, two brothers and a bodyguard.

“I believe it was actually candy of that older veteran to ask me to the ball. Sadly, my touring schedule and father are stopping me from attending an occasion with a roomful of drunken Marines. My nana mentioned she’d like to go although.”